The sexual abuse of minors is a difficult topic, but it is crucial that we talk about it. Sexual abuse of a minor is when the minor either invite or forced to participate in sexual acts with an adult or a person who is older than they are.
Sexual abuse can take many forms for a child, for example:
· When a child is forced or invited to participate in acts which sexually excite the other person, is sexual abuse
· When a person fails to respect the child’s body and touches their private parts (vagina, penis, or anus), it is sexual abuse
· When you caress a child that does not wish to be caressed or do so in an inappropriate manner, that is sexual abuse
· When you expose the child’s body in an immoral or pornographic manner, it is also sexual abuse
Those committing sexual acts on minors can be male or female. On Aruba, the abusers are primarily male, and 80% of the time they are family members. In certain cases of sexual abuse, the one committing the abuse is also a minor (under the age of 18). It is completely possible for a teenager to also be an abuser.
Acts that can be committed when referring to sexual abuse of a minor:
· Sexual acts with penetration, such as rape
· Sexual acts without penetration such as oral sexy, groping or touching of the private parts with clothes on, grinding, kissing or masturbation
· Letting a child watch others participate in sexual acts, whether it’s porn or in-person
· Allowing a child to play or use objects intended for sexual pleasure
· Telling a child jokes with a double meaning or that sets a bad example is also a form of abuse with bad intention
· Asking or forcing a child to take off their clothing for sexual pleasure
· Showing a child your private parts, otherwise known as flashing
· Encouraging a child to act in a sexual manner
· Preparing a child for sexual activity or abuse for when they get older, otherwise known as grooming
All of these acts are considered sexual abuse. Sexual abuse is punishable by law and goes against the international rights of children.
How to spot sexual abuse in a child?
When a child is sexually abused it can often be recognized by certain signs. There might be various signs and they will differ per child and per situation. It is important to note that there is a possibility that these signs do not indicate an instance of sexual child abuse and that they can also be caused by something else. It is important to stay alert and to speak up and ask for help or advice from our professionals. With the right course of action, lives could be saved.
Signs of sexual abuse:
· A child expresses and speaks up about being sexually abused
· The child demonstrates sexual knowledge or sexual behavior that does not correspond with normal behavior for their age
· The child disassociates themselves from friends and family
· The child runs away from home
· The child behaves strangely or is shy with a specific person
· The child experiences frequent nightmares
· The child starts wetting the bed all of a sudden
· The child’s mood and/or appetite changes drastically
· The child is pregnant or contracts a sexually transmitted disease (STD)
· The child shows physical changes such as not being able to walk properly or sit down
· The child gets a rash near their mouth
· The child scratches or itches their private parts a lot (penis, vagina, or anus)
When a child is sexually abused, 80% of the time it is by somebody they know. In cases of sexual abuse, the child can often be forced to keep the relationship a secret and can even be threatened that something terrible will happen to someone they love if they were to tell anybody.
As an adult or educator, it is important to realize that to be able to combat this problem we must start at home. By talking to your children about this topic, you provide them with the tools to be able to defend themselves and their bodies when they are found in dangerous and uncomfortable situations. The second way we should act is by breaking the cultural silence around this topic that has been dominating our island for many years. When we start acting and denouncing these people, we show the abusers that they no longer have the liberty to commit sexual crimes.
Act now, do not keep quiet! If you suspect that a child is being abused please contact the Sostenemi Bureau at 588-1010 for help and advice. If you are in an emergency situation and you feel like your life and the lives of your children are at risk, please contact the police at 100.
For more information on child abuse visit our website at www.scparuba.com. “the safety and wellbeing of our children is everyone’s responsibility”- Social Crisis Plan
